A Quiet Time For Reflection





I wonder if I've been changed in the night? Let me think: was I the same when I got up this morning? I almost think I can remember feeling a little different. But if I'm not the same, the next question is, Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle!
-Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, Lewis Carroll



Life and Death.

Love and Hate.

Trust and Betrayal.


Threads of thought wove themselves through his mind, coming together to form a complete picture in the mural of his mind. Flashes of past events, uncountable ages ago. Visions of future happenings, seconds in wait, and in eons to come.

The landscape before him was reflected in his clouded purple eyes. He no longer saw in the conventional sense. Everything was connected, yet detached. All was made of the same material. Twisting lines ran through everything, weaving themselves into objects, colors, scents, everything. The strands of space and time themselves were his to manipulate. With a simple expression of will, the strands, multicolored in every way imaginable and unimaginable, conjoined to form the world as we see it in his eyes.

A bleak, gray world lay before him. It could be easily seen that it once teemed with life, husks of plants and animals scattered sparsely over the land. The burned and twisted remains of what once was a bustling center of life lay in the distance, in the shadow of a derelict castle larger than what would seemed to have been allowed.

In a space of time shorter than that of a mere thought, he was walking up to the once magnificent castle. Its four gleaming spires that used to shine so brightly were now caved in. The gates, always open in their time, were splintered and scattered about the vicinity. He passed underneath the arch, into which the name of the castle was carved. Now hardly distinguishable from the rest of the stone, the generations of eroding had taken their toll. The name was now lost, as was the land.

He continued, never wavering in his pace or posture, but taking everything in. The material no longer held any of his interest. It was the thoughts and memories and feelings contained within that interested him. Every particle told a tale.

If these walls could talk...

The thought echoed off of the walls, as if it had been said aloud, and then faded.

He was headed towards a specific destination, clearly.

The west portion of the ruin.

His old domain.


A fine young man smiled forth. He was clad in brilliant scarlet and gold, matching his mass of hair. Hair that was like a crest of feathers from the plumage of a phoenix. And that was, quite accurately, what it was.

Next to him, a slender figure that seemed to be made of moonlight. She had the form of a young girl, but the eyes... Eyes that had suffered such pain, but knew nothing but a blissful joy at that time. She had wings, one of which was folded around the young man.

They held each other in an embrace of love. An embrace that had lasted for a span of time that was almost too large to be measured. And it had lasted for him to see it again.

Standing in the derelict room, staring at the portrait painted of a person that he used to be, along with the person he loved more than anything in all existence. He turned away from it, from the loving gaze that the painting held on him. Away from the pain inside his heart.

A mirror faced him, on the opposite side of the room. And he looked at himself, compared to the noble figure in the painting behind him, that still gazed at him with two sets of eyes into the mirror and back at him.

Younger, now, he was. A sorrowful boy compared to the fine young man. Dressed in silver and black, in a simple garb and sandals. His hair was now silver, and jutted upwards in a spiky fashion, much shorter than it had been. And the eyes, the pale purple eyes so empty versus the shining emeralds of his former self. Eyes that held so much joy and happiness. The scar that once held place on the underside of his jaw was gone now, given to him after the painting had been made.

"What have you become," he whispered, "you once-proud being named Bryan?"

Bryan's reflection gave no answer, simply mouthing back what he had said. A fierce look flashed through his eyes, and the mirror shattered, fracturing into millions upon millions of shards.

All at once, Bryan was floating in the cold vacuum outside of the dead planet, the core of all realities. He looked at his place of conception, calculating, considering. He didn't so much as shed a tear as the planet was annihilated in an explosion of fury and anger comparable to a supernova, all originating from an outstretched finger. A slight shudder came over him as the ambient energy still left there was absorbed, and then nothing.

He watched the fragments drift off, only to be swallowed by the infinite dark. Only then did Bryan close his eyes, and slowly faded from that plane.


Bryan rode a wave that wove between the fabrics of all the separate universes, silently watching. He had only to think of it, and then he was there, standing in an endless desert. Upon a raised platform of rock, Ashe Askari sat, legs crossed and head bent in meditation.

His hair blew in whatever direction the wind pulled,  but he never moved. Bryan considered his old companion for a moment, then moved forward, to one of the beings behind Askari himself.

In the remote icelands of a planet without a star, Bryan found him. There was no light, save for the tiny blinking of the stars far away, but neither of them needed light to see.

The being called Silif raised his eyes from the ground to behold this person before him.

"Bryan."

It wasn't a greeting or challenge, simply a acknowledgment of his existence. Silif knew Bryan's capabilities, and disliked the fact that he didn't know the full extent of them, or the fact that the ones he did know of were beyond those of himself.

But this person in front of him in the form of a young boy, yet clearly Bryan Amethyst, was lost, adrift, without meaning. And without any aggression. So Silif would bear his company for a time.

Bryan raised his hand in greeting, and slowly walked over to where Silif stood. He didn't walk slow because of the tremendous gravity that held the iceball together, or for suspense, but because he seemed truly tired.

"I don't know what to do," he said in a quiet voice.

Silif regarded him again. "And you think I do? You think I have your answer? You think falsely."

Bryan shot Silif a look that purposely made an invisible force smack him across the face, jewel-like tears at the corners of his eyes. "Don't treat me as the child this body seems, for I am older than you shall ever be. But impleasantries aside, I don't have any direction. My soul was destroyed, then replaced by the darkness that had clouded it once before; my home was in ruin from whatever cataclysm that had destroyed me; and to top it off, I look like a silver-haired Super Saiya-jin."

"'Was' in ruin? You destroyed it, didn't you?"

"There was no point to let the dead past drift in restlessness."

"True. Extreme, but true. And so you seek comfort in those you know? Perhaps they might have a clue as to what path you should next take? I'm sure Askari was of no assistance."

"You should remember his choice for his own fate. An eternal bond with the endless desert of Arakis. A meditation linking him and the planet while his body remains as an example to whoever the hell would travel to his godforsaken land."

Silif simply stood, unwavering, without thought or speech. And so he stood as that until Bryan faded from view. He could no longer sense his presence, even though Bryan could mask it from him, but Silif knew he was gone.

And Silif simply stood, not breathing, nor thinking, nor moving at all.


Bryan felt the dark matter and energy pulse around him as he shifted realities. He wrapped himself in invisibility, to go undetected by even the straggling wraiths that haunted this plane. And he flew towards his destination.

Hazama sighed, letting his arms drop to the floor next to him. He stared up at hours of work, that all amounted to nothing. By all means, the damn thing should be in perfect working order. With a frustrated growl, he pushed himself out of the tiny space for maintenance, and hopped out of the mobile suit's cockpit onto the platform raised to its chest.

Cursing, he wiped sweat and oil and grease from his face. In a brisk pace, he walked away from the latest addition to his collection. He looked out into the vast expanse of his garage. Mobile suits of all types were there. From the Gundams, MegaDeuces, even an Eva unit, and more. All conquests in former days of glory.

Not that he was past his prime. Hell no. There wasn't a speck of gray in his hair, and even if there was, it'd be too scared to show itself. He stepped onto a transportation pad, and was instantly teleported to an identical one in the kitchen complex.

The only thing harder than his will was his stomach, and his stomach was empty. And it didn't like being empty. He loaded up on a sandwich, some chips, and a soda or two, then looked out through a window into the garage, thinking idly.

Flying through the air of Saiya-jin Prime, Namek, Icer...

Going Super Saiya-jin for the first time...

Hunkering around the Capsule in mobile suits, battling each other for fun...

Just what the hell ever happened to Bryan?

Something caught Hazama's eye, pulling his vision over to the mobile suit he'd just cursed back to the womb of its harlot mother.

The TallGeese IV's cockpit was glowing brightly, fully operational. Hazama just cracked a half-smile, leaning on the windowsill with his elbow, and wondered what the hell happened.


Aeris stepped from the water, pulling on a bathrobe. It was raining outside, and the only place suitable for a rainy day was a hot bath. She dried her hair with a towel, then looked at herself in the mirror. If only...

She shook her head, clearing her thoughts for a moment. But, as always, they turned back to him. Why had he disappeared so suddenly? What was it that had shocked him so? She could see it in his eyes the last time she saw him.

-

He was hurrying about, gathering things in a great rush. He only spoke in fast, brief instances.

"I'm sorry..."

"Something's happened..."

"I can't say, because I don't know..."

"You might not see me again..."

"Good-bye..."

And as abruptly as he had come into her life, he was out of it.

-

She knew it had to be her. It had to be somehow her fault. Maybe because she wasn't Tifa. Aeris could remember the way he smiled at her, slightly different than how he usually would anyone else. The slight change in posture, ease of speech, and a different sharpness to his eyes. Aeris could tell. She didn't try to hide that she had fell for him, so it made it easier for her to just watch everything he did.

She opened her robe, looking down at herself. A perfect figure, some would say. Fair skin, smooth and gentle and soft. Maybe if her breasts were larger, or her hips wider... Maybe then, Bryan might have taken more notice to her, and not Tifa. Might have softly stroked her cheek. Might have put his arms around her. Might have leaned down to gently press his lips to hers...

A crack of lightning, followed by the echoing blast of thunder shook her from her daydream. Something... something wasn't right. Or maybe...

Maybe...

Something was right. She knew it! She could feel it!

Aeris hurried through her house, oblivious to the fact that her robe trailed behind her like a banner of emeralds. Through the hall, down the stairs, to the front door.

Another crash of thunder made her jump. Through a window, she could see someone standing outside. Aeris reached with a trembling hand to the doorknob. With an effort that seemed tremendous to her, she opened the door, and gave a startled cry.

A young boy of maybe 18 or so stood on her doorstep, drenched by the rain, his silver hair down covering his face. He wobbled for a moment, then pitched forward.

Aeris caught him, and brought him inside immediately. Brushing away his hair, she brought him into the light, so that she could see his soaked features.

"Bryan..."

He was younger, but she knew it was him. She absolutely knew! She hugged him as close to her as she could, silently crying. A single tear fell from her cheek, landing on his forehead. His eyelids fluttered, and she saw flashes of purple eyes underneath. His voice was weak.

"A... Aeris? I'm... s-so... tired... so tired..."

"Shh... I'll take care of you. Quiet now."

Aeris led him up the stairs, down the hall, and into her room. She dried him, surprised to find that after turning around once to get a new towel, his clothes had changed into soft pajamas of some unknown material, totally dry. Bryan's eyes fluttered open every so often, looking around before they closed once more.

She brought him into bed, turning off the lights. He clutched her gently, comforted by her warmth. "You forgot to wear anything..." he said dreamily, eyes anchored closed. Aeris just smiled, blushing slightly. She put her arms around him, rocking him gently as if a child that she cradled, whispering softly in his ear as she held his hand. And for the first time since the last night he spent with his wife, ages ago, Bryan slept.

Soon after, the only sounds in the house were the rain hitting the roof, and the soft breathing of two people who had found each other again.


Deep in space, somewhere that no one had ever ventured, a single object moved against the inky background of the flickering white pinpoints of light that were the stars. It was rectangular, and surprisingly, intact. Ice and crystallized bits of atmosphere clung to it, making what was on it absolutely indecipherable.

But, a phosphorescent hunk of mineral happened to pass close by, bathing the object in a pale light. As it turned out, all that could be seen underneath the ice and crystal, were the smiles of two people, and their hands clasped together...

And the object kept going.

To where?

No one can be certain.



I have seen many people, and many ways, many things.

Untold wonders, and both accepted as well as secret truths about the universes and all inside them.

Countless of each.

And as hard as it may be for me, right now...

I know that I have far more to see.